Celebration and Mourning

On Friday my family and I drove to Toledo, OH for a wedding. The wedding was on Saturday and it was a nice service. I am always happy when two people find love in each other and decide to spend life's journey together. After the reception we went out to a local bar and the bride and groom came out with us and they were still in their wedding clothes. I had mentioned to the bride that I couldn't wait to get out of my dress because I was so uncomfortable. Oh well different strokes for different folks.

On Sunday I got up and went to brush my teeth. While standing there I heard what sounded like Bev (the mother-in-law) crying. I came downstairs and she along with Brad and Chris (the brother-in-law) were standing hugging each other. I asked what was wrong and Chris took my hand as Bev was telling me that her 19 year old nephew was killed in a car accident at 0600. Throughout the day we got more and more information. Jacob was on his way to work when he ran off the road, over corrected, crossed the center lines and hit passenger side into a tree. The crash was so loud that it woke up the people that lived right in front of the tree. They said that the car was on fire when they rushed out to help. At 0624, the fire had been extinguished and Jacob was extricated from the car and pronounced dead.

I can't help but wonder why my family and I felt it so important to be here for this wedding. I never wanted anything like this to happen but I must say I am glad that we were here when it did. We went over to Jacob's parents house (Amy and Rex) to grieve with them. I can relate to Amy and Rex as parents. We are not supposed to bury our babies. They are supposed to bury us. They have had an enormous out pouring of support from the community, family and friends. Its never easy to say goodbye to a loved one especially when that loved one is your child. When I told Aaron (my son) what had happened, he stood up and leaned into me crying. Its not everyday that true emotion is coming through for him. One of my traits he got I suppose. He and Jacob would play together when we were around for family functions.

I find myself feeling guilty now. Thank God we didn't receive such horrible news. I get to tuck my kids in at night still and kiss and hug them.

Anyway I have a few pieces of advice for all of us. WEAR YOUR SEAT BELT!!!!!! Jacob did not have his seat belt on. If he did would that have changed his outcome? We'll never know but it could have.

Tell your family that you love them. Be there for them always. Even when they make crap decisions always let them know what they mean to you. You never know that could be the last time you talk to them.